Megan. 20. AZ. My Tumblr says it all.
my writing
The love of my life


he keeps getting stuck in the couch

"   I’m never gonna wait that extra twenty minutes to text you back, and I’m never gonna play hard to get when I know your life has been hard enough already. When we all know everyone’s life has been hard enough already, it’s hard to watch the game we make of love, like everyone’s playing checkers with their scars, saying checkmate whenever they get out without a broken heart.   "
Andrea Gibson
"   Act my age?
What the fuck is that, “act my age”?
What do I care how old I am?
The Ocean is old as fuck.
It will still drown your ass with vigor.   "
the greatest thing i have ever read  (via get-fit2fuck)

I usually don’t talk about self harming on my tumblr because it’s been a very hard and personal journey I’ve faced. However, I finally want to talk about it because for once, it’s something positive to say. I struggled with cutting for years and years and I think the longest I ever went without it was a month or two, tops. This time around though it’s been 9 months that I haven’t done it. I was so stuck in self harm I honestly didn’t see a time where I wouldn’t do it. It hasn’t been easy and I can’t say I don’t still struggle or I don’t think about it but that’s the amazing part. That I still struggle but have not given in, that’s something I could have never done 9 months ago. Having a human being growing inside me has made me change and want to be a stronger person. I love her so much and my body is made for her to grow and feel safe in, not for me to torture and cut. It’s a little scary to think about what happens when she’s out of me because it would be easier to excuse my behavior but I’ve made it this far and I want to keep trying, no matter how hard it is. The only new scars allowed on me are these damn stretch marks my little peanut made ♡

I hate when I can’t sleep. I also hate that this problem occcurs practically every single night. It’s almost 5 am and no matter what I do I just can’t sleep :(


"Are you gonna write about this?"

Like his mediocre lines
and the way he butchered the names of Thai food
had me shaking at the knees.
Like that was something worth noting.

I still wrote three poems about my last dinner date.
I live in a world where I am blessed to believe that
everything is something worth noting.

But people tell me that if I keep writing poetry
about every mouth I meet,
nobody’s going to want to kiss me anymore.

The first time that someone compared my poems
to Taylor Swift songs,
I didn’t know that it wasn’t supposed to be a compliment.
It turns out they weren’t saying: “thank you
for your honesty, your openness, your willingness
to make life into art even when it gets tough to pronounce”.

They were saying: “All you write are love poems.”
Like that wasn’t okay.
Like that was somehow discrediting or laughable.
They were saying: “You go on too many dates
and you can’t make them stay.”
And I don’t know how to shake that off.

I live in a world where I am blessed to believe that
everything is something worth noting,
even bad dinner dates.
I also live in a world where a 24 year old Taylor Swift
can’t write about bad dinner dates anymore.
A world where she has sworn off dating and written an album
with a curt nod to love instead of a wide smile,
because she’s sick of her love life being an American pastime,
a comedic punchline every time she leaves the house.

“Watch out: she might write a song about you!”

God forbid she tells the world that you’re a sloppy kisser.
God forbid she tells the world that it still hurts that you left.

She is a girl with a big heart and a bigger mouth
and she owns everything that ever happens to her.

I own everything that ever happens to me

and I refuse straddle the line between privacy and honesty
for the sake of someone else’s comfort level.
I will not be a Disney mermaid
willing to give up her own voice for love.

Forget legs.
Choke on water, choke on ink.
I will not kiss another man who refuses to learn how to swim.


"Me vs. Taylor Swift vs. Ariel" Trista Mateer (via simply-sloth)

Trista Mateer, everyone.

(via clementinevonradics)




  Some finished photos of my glittery gothic dress! I’m quite pleased with how it came out. I hope I manage to get decent photos before the season passes. 

It’s made from cotton broadcloth, tulle, spirit fabrics, and heap of seasonal decor items from Michaels! The dress was a challenge of patience since things kept going wrong but it wasn’t very difficult to make. 

I have two blog posts about making it, a video on making matching crowns, and a few other dresses made with the same method!


low key crying right now this is perfection. 


My little peanut is a night owl just like her mommy. She keeps me company when I can’t sleep. I love her so much. Less than 2 months and I get to hold her in my arms and cuddle the shit out of her ♡ and I love her daddy too even though he drives me bat shit crazy. My little family is the best.

"   It was probably nothing but it felt like the world.   "
Morrissey, Autobiography (p. 141)